Planing Your Wedding Part One: The Basics

"Planing Your Wedding Part One: The Basics"

BY DJ Tommy Mac & DJ Dollar Bill

So you've decided to get married! Congratulations!

By now you're starting to realize just how much planning and organization it takes to make a wedding day run smoothly, and are looking for some ideas and tips on the best ways to do things...that's why I'm here, to help you out.

Most wedding receptions today follow a pretty basic format, and while the order of certain events can vary from party to party, the general outline of events for the reception is as follows:

first hour: Cocktails - guests are just arriving, settling in, and helping themselves to some food and drinks. The Bride & Groom (along with the bridal party) may be there at that point, or may be off doing pictures somewhere and arrive later.

Once the bridal party has arrived and cocktails are over, what happens next?

The basic outline is:

Bridal party introductions

Bride & Grooms First Dance

Bridal party dance (optional)

Blessing of the meal (optional)

Toasts (optional)

dinner hour

At most reception halls I work at in this area, the caterers prefer the DJ's NOT to play dance music during the dinner service, as they wish the guests to remain more or less seated for easier service. There have been cases where there are longer gaps in time between courses and I have been asked to dance the guests for short spurts in between but this is usually a rare case. (Me personally I like to play Classics depending on your type of music you like; to keep guests heads bobbing, feet tapping, sing a long & a few may dance) I've noticed every crowd is different, some will dance during dinner & most wait til after cake cutting.

If there are 3 courses, i.e. Soup, Salad & Entree. I will do Parent dances ((Bride with father, Groom with mother) in between Salad & Entree. Approx hour after Bride & Groom receive their entree than:

Bouquet & Garter Toss (optional)

Cutting the Cake

The timing of these events varies from wedding to wedding, depending on both the timeline of the reception hall and the bride & grooms wishes. Your DJ can also help to coordinate all these events to make the day run smoothly, and in future posts I will go into greater detail with suggestions for the best ways to organize these events, as well as several different options and variations.

There will also need to be time set aside for the bride, groom, and family members to have pictures taken together. Make sure your photographer & DJ work together so that things don't get confused. For example, you don't want your DJ starting the cake cutting if the photographer is out in the lobby taking family portraits. A good DJ will always make sure the bride, groom, photographer, videographer and banquet manager are all prepared before starting any major event. Coordinating all these various events is a team effort and all contractors you hire should be willing to work with the others so that YOU don't have to worry about things the day of. If everyone is working together as a team and have coordinated their timelines beforehand, everything should run smoothly. I am not just your DJ....I'm your MC & Time Keeper (so you can let those of you with wedding coordinators, I got this :)

Keep in mind, there are no hard, fast RULES to what you must do at your wedding reception; some people enjoy things like the garter & bouquet toss, others feel that is not important to them and would rather skip it...the choice is up to YOU.

Some couples like to plan other special events for their reception, such as slide shows, or hire another entertainer, such as dancers, to perform at some point in the evening. Others have a family member or friend who they have asked to perform a live song for the bride & groom, either by playing live with an instrument or singing along to a musical track provided to the DJ.

While these things can be fun and add a special touch to your wedding day, keep in mind they need to be planned out accordingly at the proper times to make the day flow easily. Again, talking these things over in ADVANCE with your DJ, along with your banquet manager, will help things run smoothly.

In future posts, I will go into greater details on each of the special events of a wedding reception to give you a clearer understanding of why they are done and the best times to do them... or if you choose to do them at all.

Planning Your Wedding Part 2: Let's Talk About Music"

Planning Your Wedding Part 2: Let's Talk About Music

A post Created By DJ Tommy Mac & Edited by DJ Dollar Bill

One of the biggest concerns, hands down, of any couple on the wedding day is what music should be played.

I generally run into two types of couples: Those who have very specific ideas of what they want and enjoy musically, and those who really have no clue and need my help.

Here are some helpful tips and ideas for you in arranging the perfect selection of music for your special day.

(note: while I will specifically be talking about weddings in most of these posts, they can be applied to any type of event as well)

First and foremost: Music selected for your wedding should be FUN. A wedding day is all about celebrating the union of two people and the joy of celebrating with family and friends, and the music selected should reflect that.

While there are no hard, fast RULES to any of it, in general the music selected should be fun and upbeat, appropriate for all age ranges (IE clean, no vulgarity or crude, explicit language) and lend it self to the joy and celebratory mood of the entire day...and of course, part of that celebration includes DANCING, so there should be plenty of songs chosen which are great to dance to.

Music, as with many other things in life, is a very subjective thing: what one person LOVES, another person HATES.

Keep in mind that, at your wedding, you will have a large variety of people there: Friends, family, co-workers...and not all of them will have the same musical tastes you do.

My general suggestion to my couples when selecting music is: allow something for everyone, try not to limit your music choices to just ONE style or era. You may LOVE todays latest club tunes or hip hop tracks, but think about whether your family or friends will enjoy hearing that all night long.

As your DJ, my job is to find the happy medium between what you, my clients, want, and what will make all the guests attending your special day happy as well.

I’m often asked how I as the DJ select the music that I will play for any given party, and my answer is simple: It’s combining selections from three different sources:

1: My Bride & Groom: The Bride & Groom’s requests take priority and are the basis for what ever else I chose to play through out the evening. I base my choices not only on their selections, but also what they have told me they do NOT wish to have played.

2: Guest requests: I am more than happy to take requests from guests, and as long as they fall into the appropriate guidelines I play as many as possible. Appropriate guidelines for guest requests are:

A: They meet with my bride & grooms specifications, IE are not on the “Do Not Play” list.

B: Are appropriate for the crowd: Unless it’s already been cleared by the bride & groom, a guests request for heavy metal or hardcore rap will NOT be getting played. Also any songs in general that are just inappropriate for the day: Break up songs, depressing songs, or songs that are totally obscure that no one else has ever heard of, will generally not get played.

(there are exceptions to every rule: I Will Survive is one of the most popular “break up” songs of all time and is requested and played regularly at many weddings, for example.)

3: DJ Knowledge: As a DJ with 25 years of experience, I bring my own personal knowledge of what works best to get a crowd up, dancing and having fun, and use my client & guest requests along with that knowledge to fill in the gaps and make it all flow together.

I am more than happy to accept any song list requests from my couples, and encourage them to choose at least 10-20 songs they definitely want played. Leaves me wiggle room to feel out the crowd & take some guests request. (On a AVERAGE ONLY 10-15 songs are played in an hour) My job is that much easier when I don’t have to GUESS what my couples enjoy listening and dancing to.

So I refrain from long 50 song list, most events not that long & doesnt leave room for any requests or for me to play something that crowd will dance to (Classics Always work)

Ex. I had a couple wanted nothing but 80's music & provide ALL the music for dinner & dancing, (which I tried to talk them out of, but said it's YOUR day...your wish is my command...Musical Genie) 1/2 way through event they came to me & said no one's dancing. I advised them, they picked the music not me & to break the chains off & let me do what I DO. They said go ahead Dollar & I kept the dancefloor packed the rest of the night.

2nd Ex. A couple picked few songs that wasnt popular & it cleared my dance floor, I immediately faded out song & re-packed dancefloor. That comes with experience & bride's mother thanked me at the end for not letting entire song play.

That being said, if you find your list getting very long, I always suggest giving me a “Top 10” of your favorite songs that MUST be played, and then allowing me to chose and select the best cuts from the rest of your requests to fill out the party.

I also encourage the “Do Not Play” list; it is almost, if not as important, as your requests. Again it helps me to know in advance the types of songs or music you simply, under no circumstances, want to hear at your party, so that should a request for one come in I know how to handle it. (I'm your BLOCKER)

While I have suggested planning and choosing your music with your guests in mind, this does not mean you can not choose some of your favorite selections and artists to be played at your wedding that may not be considered “standard” wedding music.

I get plenty of couples that enjoy such music as rap, alternative rock, hard rock, country, etc. that would love to hear some songs from these types of groups but worry that they shouldn’t have them played because of how the crowd may react.

Again, that’s where I can step in and help, for instance:

Even some of the most “alternative” or “heavy metal” bands have at least ONE nice acoustic or piano ballad type song that may just fit in as a slow dance or at least something that can be played during dinner.

I’ve also encouraged hard rock fans to choose something from that genre for their introduction music.

Same with rap: While it can be tricky at times depending on the song, there is no reason why some of your favorites can’t get played at your wedding, even if it’s only you and your friends who may dance to it. Not EVERY song played HAS to get EVERYONE involved.

My usual suggestion for these types of things is to perhaps save them for later in the evening; many times the older guests will start to leave early or at least tire out and aren’t dancing as much, and that’s the best time to work in some of those “alternate” choices. I also always suggest that the bride & groom should make an effort to actually come out and dance to these songs to make it clear that this is something THEY enjoy and chose to have played at their wedding; if the guests see YOU out there on the floor enjoying it, perhaps they will rethink their stance on the music and loosen up enough to join you.

As I said earlier, there are no hard, fast RULES to what can and can NOT be played at a wedding; in the end it is up to you to make those choices.

Select what you like, be willing to compromise, take into consideration your guests, and most importantly have FUN with it...in the end, that’s what it’s all about.

After All It's "YOUR DAY" and a Celebration !!

Are You A Good DJ or a Lazy DJ?

Let's focus on the little things that separate the Good DJs from the Lazy DJs. Some of you will read this column and say to yourself,“I've been doing it my way for years and it works fine, I'm not going to change” and to you I say “That's a shame”. None of us are ever so great that we cannot improve.

Now we are going to tackle one of the many problems in making a good first impression at your party – Introductions. In the course of handling complaint calls from our clients, I've come to notice that one of the biggest problems DJs have with the introductions is the fact that they don't take charge of the situation. When do you start to take charge of the situation? During the phone call. While you are talking to the bride on the phone, it is imperative that you get the order of the bridal party and the correct pronunciations of their names. It is too hectic the day of the event to get all of this information correct and maintain an impression of professionalism. In addition, before you line up the bridal party you should be practicing the pronunciations of their names. This way when you do line them up and you rattle off the correct pronunciation of their names, they will be impressed. (GOOD FIRST IMPRESSION). There have been countless times where I have nailed the pronunciation of somebody's difficult last name during the line up and they turn to me and go “damn you're good”. (Yep that's right pencil neck, now listen up bridal party, I'm the man and I'm in charge)

Do not allow the catering staff to take your intro sheet and run off into the hallway to line the bridal party up unaccompanied (Go with them). If you don't go with them and there are changes or problems, you are going to be informed of them second hand and that is where the problems can occur. Take the initiative and line up the bridal party yourself, even if the staff offers to do so. However, if the staff insists on doing it themselves, go with them and be cooperative. As the staff lines them up, follow up behind and confirm the names yourself. Be a good DJ, not a lazy DJ.

The purpose of lining up the bridal party is multi functional. 1. Make sure you have the correct order for the introductions. 2. Confirm the pronunciations of names. 3 Evaluate the Child Factor (are they coming in, are they sleeping, are they coming in with Mom and Dad, are they screaming, are they being a pain, are they shy, etc). You need to be aware. 4. A last minute confirmation of the days events with the Bride and Groom. (First Dance, Toast, Grace, etc.) 5 Lastly, it allows you to get a feel for the Bride & Groom, the Parents and the Bridal Party and pump them up for the big day.

Leave nothing to chance when you walk out to the CENTER of the dance floor to do your introductions. If you do, then you leave open the possibility to make a mistake, look confused and make a bad first impression. You are the ring leader, this is your moment, be confident, be poised and be prepared. Be a good DJ, not a lazy DJ.

Dealing with a Banquet Manager or Caterer

Dealing with a B.M. (Banquet Manager) or Caterer can be one of the most important duties you face as a Disc Jockey. Since these managers do numerous parties each weekend it is a great idea to MAKE them LOVE YOU! This can sometimes be a very difficult task because not every person we meet is NICE! But having a B.M. on your side can increase your repeat business as well as have an EXCELLENT reference for your future clients.

The following list will help keep you on the B.M.s GOOD side:

1) Be there 1 HOUR or more early – Being Late will show them that you are not a professional.

2) Meet with B.M. as soon as you arrive – items to go over:
* Where is the closest power outlet & where tables are?
* Where can you unload? (Always ask this!!!)
* Is your attire appropriate to load?

3) Treat their hall with respect – when loading & unloading Equipment
* Keep doors closed in summer & winter to save Electricity
* Do Not Scuff The Floors or Walls with your Equipment.
* DO NOT ASK TO EAT! Ask what kind of dinner is being served, sit-down or buffet, is cake bagged or for Desert?

4) Don’t blast music during your sound check – Be as quick as you can.

5) When lining up bridal party invite B.M. with you & introduce him.
If they haven’t been introduced yet….

6) Always let B.M. know your every MOVE – Intros, Cake, garter, bouquet, etc.
* Ask if now is the right time to do it
* Always go along with their way of doing things.

7) At the end of the party Remember to say GOODBYE:

This is a good time to ask if he liked your performance, if they recommend DJs, if they have a house DJ, or do they want you to be their house DJ! In any Case always be POLITE and make sure you exchange Business Cards. If they don’t have one you SHOULD ALWAYS write down the B.M.s name, the name of the Hall, and the address or city you are in. Then follow up the following week with a courtesy call that might get you more business. Thank You cards with your business cards are also an excellent Idea. Remember, just like any other job we don't always LIKE the people we sometimes have to work along side, but that doesn't mean we don't treat them with respect and professionalism.

If you have any other suggestions please add them here as a reply!